tony died last sunday night

i love you

it’s taken me more than a week to write this post and “announce” to the world that tony, my best friend and loyal companion, died on sunday jan 15th 2012 at roughly 7:30pm. i loved tony more than anything or any person over the last ten years. he was an incredible dog with a human soul. if you knew me or any of my bands then you of course knew tony. in many ways we helped define each other. if you did have the pleasure of meeting tony then you know exactly what i mean when i say this — he was indeed a different breed and definitely a special being.

on saturday the 14th tony was diagnosed with severe lymphoblastic lymphoma and given a few days at most to live. over the next 24 hours some of his closest human friends came to see him and say goodbye. what all of these people had in common was that he really loved seeing them. thanks to all of you for dropping whatever you were doing and coming to see him. i believe it was extremely important that he saw you so that his tail would wag one last time (and it did) even if he couldnt stand up.

by the morning of the 15th tony could barely walk, wag his tail or lift up his head. he spent most of sunday outside on the porch resting in his bed as if he knew he was soaking up his last few glimpses of the warm california sun. looking back on it, i believe tony had decided that was the exact place where he wanted to spend his last moments on earth. in fact, right after it got dark out and i carried him inside he got up and somehow stumbled on his own just to make it back to that spot. this dog was a true fighter even at the end. watching him get up and walk back to that spot was a testament to just how tough, strong and proud he was. it was gut wrenching. a little while later tony was put to sleep on that porch, on that bed, while i was holding his head whispering “i love you” over and over and over again into his ear. i can’t describe how sad that moment was – as if half of my heart was forever ripped out of my chest.

to the people that have called or left messages – i appreciate it. even if i haven’t responded or don’t end up ever responding i appreciate the thoughts…thanks. if you have a pic of tony please post it on my facebook page as that would be really great to see and definitely make me smile.

the picture above was taken the evening of the 14th during one of the brief moments tony was able to stand up.

i love you tony.
– fran

19 thoughts on “tony died last sunday night

  1. Barbara says:

    Fran, I’m weeping for you over the loss of Tony. I fully understand the magnitude of loss of a dog that was both like a child and a best friend. His last moments seem lovely and you really gave him a celebration of his life at the end. Hope you’re doing better – but I know you just never get over it. He was a gorgeous boy.

  2. Sean Fodor says:

    To Tony,

    I just found out of your passing. I have known you my entire time I have spent in the California Sun (almost 14 years) I spent many hours dog sitting with you when your papa had to leave to tour, I also spent many many hours with you as I worked with your papa….You were a great being and a true friend. The tears I am shedding as I type this are testiment to the bond I had with you…You always lit up and recognized your Uncle Sean when I walked into the room.

    I miss you buddy…

    Love

    Uncle Sean…

  3. Dan Lavelle says:

    Sorry to hear the bad news Fran. I wish I could have met Tony.

    D

  4. Paula Teixeira says:

    my dearest Fran…..my heart aches for you and your post made me cry. I know that kind of love. i am sorry i never got to your side of the country to meet Tony but I know he is the best friend and companion and most loving spirit and loved you as much as you loved him. I have a special four legged angel like Tony named Amanda who is also not doing well… I understand the love and passion.

    Know that Tony gave you love and happiness and lots of laughter and smiles and his loving spirit will always stay with you. Prayers for you both….

  5. April & Adam says:

    Fran, we are deeply heartbroken and very sorry for your loss. We had the pleasure of meeting Tony, and he was so lovable and playful. He’s the reason why we have a furry family member!

    With all your love, you gave him the proper send-off where he will be forever young. I hope it brings some comfort to think of the happier times with Tony and his amazing gift of love and loyalty. His inner light will shine forever.
    You’re in our thoughts and prayers –Love, April & Adam Y

  6. Leanne says:

    Oh Fran, I can barely see through my tears to write this. I know words can not begin to express the pain your going through and I can’t begin to express how sorry I am for your loss. I never met Tony, but I know the heartbreak all too well. It was obvious through your words, photos and video that there was something pretty spectacular about him and between you two… I hope it’s somewhat reassuring to know that Tony is now in great company with my Wendell- doing what special beings do after living amazing (spoiled rotten) lives with us.
    Big hug, Leanne

  7. Noris says:

    So sorry to hear Fran.. for the brief time I got to meet Tony, it’s true, he was a special being. Sending love~
    noris

  8. Jeff Yanero says:

    So sorry, Fran. This post destroyed me to read. You gave him a great life and I know he gave you so much as well. I’m so sorry, buddy.

  9. Scotty says:

    At the break on Fri night at Steven & Zee’s you said you had to run your car to check on your dog, I loved that becaue I thought about bringing my dog that nght too.

    I didn’t know Tony but I know how you must feel
    So sorry Francis 🙁

  10. Tracey says:

    Fran,
    We said goodbye to our Fattypants the 16th and went through most of what you described. My heart breaks for you. Please take solace in the beautiful times you both shared. I know it is hard as the emptiness in your heart will ache. Just remember it is from all of the love he had to give and how lucky we are to have experienced it all.
    And here’s a hug too. ((()))
    T

  11. Jerry says:

    We said goodbye to our dear Timber in very much the same way last fall – take solace in the fact that his passing was easy, he is no longer in pain and he was with those he loved right to the end.

    Peace-

  12. Hussun says:

    <3 I have no more words to say, I am so upset over this and my heart is breaking for you. I love Tony! I used to tell people about how amazing this "One" dog is.. I have some pics saved somewhere of him, but I will dig them out somehow and post them if I can. Franny I am so soooooo sorry!! 🙁

  13. robin says:

    My God Franny , I can’t tell you how sorry I am . I truly love you and am thinking of you and Tony xoxo Robin

  14. Kampy says:

    Such sad news… so sorry for your loss Fran. I had not seen Tony in a while, but I really loved that dog, he was so chill, and you guys were inseparable. About 2.5 years ago I got a dog myself (Gidget) and that little girl has helped me through some tough times and is always happy to see me, and always makes me feel better. I can’t imagine how tough it will be to say goodbye to her someday.

    Fran, let me know if there’s anything I can do to help… I’mm gonna go through my photo archives and dig up some photos I took of Tony through the years…

    Much love brother,

    Kampy

  15. Lola says:

    Fran, I’m so sorry. That breaks my heart. He was so special, and it was always clear how much you loved him, and how he adored you. And that’s a lot of love you guys lit the world with. I’m always heartbroken when a dog dies. For such loyal and loving spirits they get so little time here. But they do teach us so much in that time. I hope your heart doesn’t hurt too much. <3

  16. Suzette says:

    Fran, I’m really sorry. You brought Tony over a couple of times and I thought he was a very sweet and loyal friend. I cried reading this as I know how he used to look at you. Thinking of you and Tony. Suzette

  17. leo says:

    Fran,

    I’m so sorry to hear about Tony. I don’t think we have a pic of him from the few times we met him, but I will have Happy check.

    I was there when Happy put her beloved Casey to sleep a few years ago, and I thought it was gut-wrenching, so I can imagine what you’re going through. Our thoughts are with you.

    leo

  18. John Caddell says:

    Fran, so sorry to hear of Tony’s passing. I never met him, but through your descriptions I feel as if I know him well. He was a one of a kind friend.

    regards, john

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